Back when the internet was wild, more porn than people, I ran a blog for a company. That company was part of a much larger company that wanted certain things I didn’t like and couldn’t deliver. Part of it was my inexperience, part of it was their ignorance.
One thing we both liked was the haikus.
We had regular meetings where they kept repeating, “SEO! Keywords!” That meant chasing trending topics and staying current.
Along the way, I stumbled upon the fact that an effective use of my time was haikus. (Most were senryu, but you get the idea.)
They make lonely keywords amusing. Relatively easy to churn out, they had some charm, and some could also be tweets. They were also a traffic spike for the blog. It became a regular thing. Celebrity Birthdays. Holidays. You name it. I wrote a “haiku” about it.
The only thing that performed better were posts commemorating celebrity deaths.
I was laid off around 2011, and sometimes I still miss the haikus.
As a nostalgic exercise, I’m going to mirror this blog, post for post, with a combination of Haiku, Senryu, Tanka, and Lunes.
I hope it also entertains.
Senryu Over Haiku
I don’t write haiku.
Really, I’m writing nonsense.
Poop! I filled the form.
- “I only want food. / Just the food. / I am word hungry!”
- “I just want your lies. / Good stories. / Nothing too real please.”
- “Restaurant Theory. / What is that? / Is it more nonsense?”
- “The Great White North, huh? / Should I care / about them OR you?”
- “Yes. Very clever. / (Your eyes roll) / Let’s just get going.”